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codekadiya 41, Male, Australia - 57 entries

Feb 2011
2:54 AM

oh saturday..

today woke up early. was about to go to the interview of Metro house keeping. hope i will get it. anyway its god wish. something good will happen. evening went to akka's place. nothing much. pretty much the whole day :D

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codekadiya 41, Male, Australia - 57 entries

Feb 2011
9:04 PM

hot to the max

aarrhh.. its a hot day.. nothing much.. went to church in the morning. then went to akka's place to have break-first. had kiribath then came home and slept. just had the lunch. have to sleep again.

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Janira 34, Female, Louisiana, USA - 19 entries

Feb 2011
10:21 PM

A Great Day!

Today I recited my poem that I wrote for the black history program and the one for color girls whp commited suicide when the rainbow is not enuf and it was great I had a really great day....=D

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Privacy963 30, Male, California, USA - 54 entries

Feb 2011
4:50 AM

Dear Diary OH woe is me for my memory is horrid and I cannot remember evrytime. Perhaps I need to use my memory more starting now. So heres an upate Egpyt and Tunisia had a revolution and now other countries have their revolts as well. Whether they tun t AMerica orto Iran we will never know. But back to home. Eveythings good so far xcept Dad's getting so I should stay away from him. Carlos M will let me hang out with him but the problem is Im busy after school and yeah Im busy I messed up with my sins again oh I hope God can forgive me I really do mess up. For now though I will pray. everything is going wll now and here this funny thing that happened today. WE were all in Biology and I accident called the teacher the wrong name and it resulted in me yelling at Richmond and stating "RICHMOND'S A LIAR LOOK AT HIS FACE" everyone started crack up and Mr.Douglas even had to leave the room. Oh yeah he joked about P guess he's not a conservative anyways his DAD is but after that was a high peak of the day. I need to sleep soon though so Yours Truly Philip Inocerta Macapagal

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Privacy963 30, Male, California, USA - 54 entries

Feb 2011
4:50 AM

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codekadiya 41, Male, Australia - 57 entries

Feb 2011
6:03 PM

aaaaaaaah gosh

today woke up at 2.45. i almost got fainted. i realized its not easy to go and work in such morning. i talked with my wife and called them and said that i wont be able to come. and slept. they tried to call me so many times. anyway its 11 now. im going out with my wife to put up the cheques and put new tires to the car. i don't know what im going to do. tomorrow interview at a hotel. if i get it i will definitely stop this. no point going in the early morning like that.

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codekadiya 41, Male, Australia - 57 entries

Feb 2011
6:24 PM

oh crap

woke up about 2.45. this is insane. i dont think i can keep going like this. anyway went to work. i know there isnt much work. but waking up that time is terrible. other thing is the university is kinda scary at night.. he he :). im not scared :D. anyway after work my wife came to pick me up. then came to the office. my boss wanted to get some good pc's so im going out today to buy those with him.

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codekadiya 41, Male, Australia - 57 entries

Feb 2011
6:25 PM

first day at UWS

woke up at 2.45 and went to UWS with my wife. i drove all the way to the UWS. and she dropped me there and went home. Anurudda ayya helped me and taught me most of the stuff which i have to do everyday with the routing information. it seems to be not that much. but kinda hard. end of the day payee is not enough. anyway what to do. now at Mkt. still sleepy. and paining my legs. i had to walk from there to my home. its like 50 min walk. kinda paining my legs. anyway i realized one thing, not actually one thing there were so many things. but one important thing which is dont give up on it and life is not what we think it is.. its so hard to live and so hard to make it real. i have completed a degree with Hons. but end of the day what i do now is cleaning and removing the duspins from the staff which barely has a degree to teach. what to do.. this is life. its not that easy. i hope something better will happen really soon. praying.. god help me.. be with me in all..

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Reborned 28, Female, California, USA - 13 entries

Feb 2011
9:22 PM CDT

Lol, happy mood!!! I think it's because of my weird obbsension with Vocaloids!!! Lol Ones I watch: Fear Garden http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZVFfeTIWWco&feature=related Trick and Treat http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=855OP6qKAOw&feature=BF&playnext=1&list=QL&index=1 Circle You Circle You http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i2RFcrreoE8&feature=BF&list=QL&index=1 Alice of Human Sacrifice http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6MltGHO-lE&feature=BF&list=QL&index=1 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMQmTIp6SRk&feature=BF&list=PL56F6B829E398113A&index=2 Dark Woods Circus http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fig2uYoLgRE&feature=BF&list=PL56F6B829E398113A&index=18 Still alot more ^^; Check out youtube!!!

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inPlainSight 40, Female, California, USA - 2 entries

Feb 2011
6:59 PM CDT

Im tired of Blogging...

I'm tired of blogging with the intent that everyone will read it. Hoping that someone reads it. Watching what I say because of who might read it and so forth. I haven't written just for me for so long. It's a weird kind of privacy to just sink into the masses and be a faceless, nameless writer. It's good though. As for my personal thoughts, I don't want them to go unattended to. I'd would rather have a perfect stranger read them than someone I know though. When blogging I have to pretend to be floating along through life perfectly. That's what everyone expects. I'm tired...

I don't want to go all dark on everyone, that's not my intention. But I don't always feel good, and I feel like I have no one to talk to about that. Everyone is busy, busy bees. Supposedly stressed because I interupt their work too much. They're not even really working. They sit there laughing at youtube, or whatever... that's not working. I feel like a 2nd class citizen to the people I thought I was 1st for. This could really depress me, but I haven't let it. It's got me down, but not depressed. I guess I'm scared of depression.

I live in chronic pain. I'm 25, overweight, ugly, and in chronic pain. I should be a miserable creature. I feel like I've been alive 250 years not 25. This pain thing is getting old. Really old. It's getting to the point where I don't even want to get out of bed. I feel like my life has been stolen and I'm trapped in this body that hates me. This fat girl is living my life like a selfish beast. Sometimes I get up the nerve to fight back against her, but... she's bigger than me, she always wins.

I just don't feel like uplifting anyone today... if I can't do it for myself how can I muster up anything for anyone else? I'm tired.

It's Valentine's day. I don't know whether to be happy or sad. Happy that I have someone who loves me, or sad that everyone forgets to love each other the rest of the year.

I feel really sick to my stomach when I look in a mirror. How does anyone love that?

Alright, well I have to go now before I get caught and interrogated...

So, bye...

Tags: blogging, chronic pain, depression, fat

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